Thankfulness as a way of Living

 I know...it's been a LONG time since I posted here.  But, as we come to the Thanksgiving season, I hope you will indulge me writing a little longer article. I began thinking about thankfulness as a way of life instead of just once a year, and it led me on a search of someone who seeks to do just that.  His name is Chad.

 

I watched a YouTube video where one man (Ryan) donated part of his liver to his brother (Chad) to keep his brother alive…and then Ryan ended up dying from complications, though he had been totally healthy before the surgery.   It was moving story in which Chad, the recipient of this gift of life, chokes up at the thought of his brother giving up his life for him.  It goes on to show the gratitude of Chad’s children as they were talking with their cousins, (Ryan’s kids) and how difficult a situation it now was for them, since they ended up losing their dad.

 

It is difficult to watch a story that without being moved.  There is something compelling about a brother who loves so much that he is willing to risk his life for a brother that is dying.  There is something noble, something right, about a man who, when he finds out that he is a match, doesn’t hesitate to step up.  You can’t watch a story like that without being moved.  Yet, in looking at the comments on Youtube underneath this video, I am amazed at how many think he did the wrong thing.

 

“Now imagine the kind of guilt he has to live with. What a shame.”

 

“Die you son of... Pray to God that Ryan's children can forgive you. I can't imagine the embarrassment you must feel. I mean imagine knowing that your dad died because of your uncle and thanks to that baby that is 38 years old and still receives kisses from his dad, you will grow up without a father! IMAGINE!”

 

“If I were Ryan’s son I’d kill Chad. It would be a slow death --trust me.”

 

“And people believe in GOD hahaha eh......if_ this ain’t proof that there’s no GOD I don’t know what is........”

 

“The guy was being selfless and God just gave him the middle-finger. Meanwhile, we have child rapists and murders in prison getting three hot meals and a bed, living long lives.”

 

First of all, I find it amazing that there are so many people who can watch a 5 minute news story and then think to pass judgment on every person in it, believing that their opinion is the only one that matters…but beyond that, I think it says something about the human condition that has turned so selfish that the perspective is one of rage and revenge or another excuse to shake your fist at God and proclaim Him to be non-existent or Someone who doesn’t care at all.  Which is the first reason we have a hard time living a life of thankfulness.

 

We have grown used to putting our perspective above all others…including the truth.  When bad things happen, we rarely challenge our own thoughts as to their rightness or wrongness.  We simply assume that if we thought them, they must be right.  We have the arrogance to believe that we are the final authority what we see and we have little room for a change in perspective. We hold to our own opinions so tightly that we refuse to see any possibility that we just might be wrong.

 

A life of ingratitude is the result.  Nothing that happens around us can then be good enough to suit us.  Nothing is worthy of our lofty heights, and it is easy to dismiss it all with a sweep of the hand as being beneath us.  Then, when trouble comes, it is also very easy to fall into a victim’s role rather than a student’s role.

 

We complain and cry that life isn’t fair and that we don’t deserve all of this pain and often conclude that if there is a God, He must hate us to put us through all of this misery.  In short, our perspective has become our god.  And our perspective is what causes us to either make thankfulness a way of life or miss out on it. 

 

Either we see things from a perspective of being grateful, or from a perspective that leaves us wanting more and feeling like we not only deserve it, but that we are getting ripped off it we don’t get it.

 

Many of us are growing past the material side of things.  That is, we’ve seen that more material possessions won’t make us any happier, but we still want more.  We never seem to be satisfied.  A new computer. A new car.  A new sofa. A new job.  A new house.  You may say, “Nope…I’m satisfied.  Don’t want any of that.”

 

What about more power?  More influence?  More skill?  More money for the job you are being asked to do?  Nope…not me.  I’m happy.  Well…maybe a little more money.  But really, I’m good.

 

More intimacy in my marriage.  More time for doing what I want.  More respect.  More love.  More appreciation from others.  Are we getting closer to home?

 

We spend our lives thinking if only we had more of something then we’d be happy.  And while we know that’s not necessarily true, the fact is, we are right.  We do need more of something.  The catch is having more… of the right stuff. 

 

If we only had more of Jesus in our lives, we would be.  If we had more trust in Divine power and less trust in ourselves, we would be more settled.  If we had more belief that God really did love us and has our best interest in mind and less doubt, we could learn to relax in His care.  Again, it’s a matter of perspective.  And where do we get that perspective?  Let’s go back to the Word.

 

A few weeks ago, we looked at the first part of this verse—and I’d like to review it—but today, I want us to focus more on the last part.

 

 

Phil 4:6-7 NIV  6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 

 

Phil. 4:6-7 NLT    Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

 

I like the way that reads, don’t you?  It makes it readily understandable. Look at verse 6 again.   Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Don’t worry, instead pray.  Now let’s look a little more closely at the last part of verse 6.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 

 

It is not wrong to have needs.  God knows what you need—but He wants to hear from you.  He wants you to articulate what you need.  Not just what you want, but what your needs are.  See—we so often tell God what we want that we’ve often confused the two.  And there is nothing wrong with telling God what you want—but remember that He has only promised to supply what you need, though often He will go far beyond that to supply some of the wants as well.

 

Tell God what you need.  Do you really know what you need?  Is it truly more money?  Or is it a more trusting heart in God and a willingness to watch His provision?

 

Is it for your loved one to be healed?  Or is it for you to learn to yield yourself to the will of God?  Which do you want and which do you really need?

 

Is it for your kids to be kept safe physically or spiritually?  Sure, we want our kids to be kept safe physically—but we need our kids to be kept safe spiritually.

 

The very act of determining our wants from our real needs can help change our perspective. Tell God what you NEED.  Not worrying—praying.  Tell Him what you need, and then look at the last statement of the verse: and thank Him for all He has done.  Go back and recount what God has already done for you.  Not just a blanket, generic, “Thank you for all your many blessings”, but where you begin to realize that He has provided for so many of your needs and wants, starting with your greatest need—salvation, and working from there.  The perspective of gratitude gives you purpose.

 

Chad will live everyday with the realization that Ryan sacrificed his life for him, and that will put new perspective into each and every day that Chad lives.  When Chad gets up and looks at himself in the mirror, he knows that he must live this new day well because of his sense of gratitude to a brother that saved his life.  I would think that this perspective would add a new meaning and purpose to life.

 

You and I can live our days with that same purpose because there was One who took our diseases upon Himself, and our worst disease, sin, was enough to do Him in—not because He had to die.  He was perfectly healthy in every way.  It was we who were sick and doomed to die.  But when He began to do a character transplant, our sickness required so much of Him that it cost His very life.   With that realization should come gratitude that changes the way we live our lives.

 

Phil. 4:6-7 NLT    Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then notice the by-product. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

 

Those four statements can change your world. Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything.  Tell God what you need.  And thank Him for all He has done.

 

That’s how you develop thankfulness as a way of life.  And the thing you are looking for becomes reality.  Peace.  You can have God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  And it is His peace that will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

 

Don’t worry.   Pray. Tell God what you need.  Thank him for what He has done.  That will change your perspective.  And that will bring you peace in your life.

 

May you have that thankfulness and peace in your life this Thanksgiving season!  Not only this season, but every day!

N 

Exhausted, Overwhelmed and Anxious? 5 Tips to Living at Peace

As the days of isolation roll on during this time of Covid-19, I find that working from home has both a relaxing and yet, draining effect.  I have actively been seeking ways to be supportive of youth pastors and local youth and young adult leaders and trying to give ideas on how ministry can be done during this crisis to lots of pastors, and just realized this morning...I'm exhausted.

And as I listen to people going through all that we are going through right now from all different perspectives, with all sorts of circumstances, many way worse than mine, I can hear exhaustion in their voice and on the Zoom calls I've been on, I can see anxiety on many faces.  And day after day of that type of drain can quickly lead someone to feeling overwhelmed...especially in light of the 24 hour news cycle which keeps it ever before our eyes.  So how do we deal?  How do we take care of ourselves so that we can continue to be useful to others?

I think first, we have to return to our faith.  I know some of you may have been away from your faith for awhile and may even have a running anger fest at God, but maybe now is the time to let that go.

Recognize that faith is not faith without the possibility of doubt.  To have faith in anything is not to remove all doubts, but to believe that there is enough evidence to believe in and then grow it from there.  For with faith, come a host of promises from God that will help you through the crisis at hand.

First, understand that Jesus never said that this life would be pain free and a smooth ride for the believer.  In fact, he said just the opposite.  In John 16:33 Jesus was speaking and he told His disciples this:  I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble. (emphasis mine) But take heart!  I have over come the world."

Even before He tells us about the trouble, He informs us that in Him we can have peace.  Suddenly, with the eyes of faith, I can gain a different perspective on the grim outlook.  I can let go of some of the anxiety and I can surrender the feelings of being overwhelmed by recognizing that the arrival of the Coronavirus and Covid-19, did not shock God off the throne.  It didn't take Him by surprise.

Did He cause it?  No.  I believe it was caused by living in a sinful world and the fact that the devil is looking to find anyway he can to sweep millions into an early grave.  Can God use it for His ultimate good?  I believe He already is!

In my own life, it is amazing how much more focused I've gotten on the things in life that really matter.  My family.  The people I serve. Relationships.  And those things that I've been leaning on to keep me propped up, distracted and unfocused suddenly aren't that important anymore.  It's surprising how my priorities are coming back into focus!  And my realization of how much I (we) truly need God.  So I would say a return to faith in God and a settling into His promises can help alleviate the exhaustion, anxiety and feeling overwhelmed.  Here's a few more promises before we move on.

Psa. 55:22 Give your burdens to the LORD,

and he will take care of you.
He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.  NLT

Or how about this one.
1Pet. 5:7 Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. NLT

The NIV even renders 1Peter 5:7 as: Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

Secondly, I would say, take this time to catch up on your sleep.  I didn't realize how sleep-deprived I was until I started staying home and suddenly began getting more hours of sleep per night.  Just getting good sleep can help you begin to relax a little more.  As we adjust to this "new normal" it is easy to begin staying up later, binge watching TV and missing sleep.

Thirdly, establish a new routine so that you aren't just totally burning the hours on Facebook or Instagram or the news channels.  Don't stay in your PJ's all day.  Getting up and getting ready for the day can actually help you feel more productive and contribute to an overall feeling of well-being.  Choose one or two things that you want to try to accomplish by days end.  Organizing a room.  Cleaning out a closet.  Catching up on your around the house to-do list.  Anything that will call on your concentration on something besides the Coronavirus will help you begin to help you regain mental health ground.  And if you feel productive, you are less likely to slide into a depression.

Fourthly, Unplug for a given amount of time each day.  You don't have to be glued to the news cycle 24-7.  As a matter of fact, I can tell you that about 95% of it will be bad.  And right now...it will be ...are you ready for this...very bad.  More deaths.  New outbreaks.  More shortages.  More political posturing.  More anger.  More frustration.  More anxiety over what else the "experts" are predicting is to come.  And the fact is, all it does is keep invoking your "fight or flight" mechanism and dumps large quantities of adrenalin into your system and simply causes your fear factor to rise.

Unplug from social media as well. Constantly checking your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok or whatever feeds, will only show more of the same you have on the news.  I'm not saying to never check them, but I am saying take some hours each day and unplug from it all to allow your anxiety and adrenaline levels to fall.  Keeping them on a knife edge all the time will only lead to exhaustion and the lowering of your body's immune system.

Here's a few questions to consider:  Are you already doing what you can do to keep you and your family safe?  Will knowing the absolute latest as soon as it hits keep you any safer?  If you are already doing everything you know, then go ahead and unplug and do something productive and let your energies be channeled towards that.  Let your focus be absorbed by that and you will find your anxiety levels beginning to drop.

And last...seek to get in some form of exercise every day.  If you have a nearby park and can still get outdoors,  try to get a walk in-of course, keeping social distancing rules in play, if not, maybe use the old treadmill and exercise equipment you've had rotting in a room for a while.  But move your body some every day.  This will boost your immune system, and help get rid of the excess adrenaline your body has been pumping out, and leave you more relaxed and able to sleep better.

Let me leave you with this: Quite a few years back, I watched a Mark Lowry video as he shared his "favorite verse."  He then quoted. "And it came to pass..."  He stopped and smiled...then continued.  "Do you get it?  It didn't come to stay!  It came to pass."  So with a nod to Mark, here is my take on his "favorite verse".

Whatever you are facing today--just know that it will pass. Corona Virus...As hard as it is to believe...It will pass! On the flip side...are you having a great day? Enjoy it! It will pass. Facing tough stuff? Endure it. It will pass. It came...to pass.

God never leaves us stuck. Time moves on and it will pass. Focus on that and these little tips and you can come into a "new normal" soon.  And 

What Should I Worry About Now?

Most of us spend our lives worrying, don’t we? We worry about how people will accept us. We worry about our clothes—are they nice enough or with it enough?. We worry about acne. We worry about our bodies—are we too fat or too skinny or too tall or too short or too ugly or somehow not acceptable. We worry about our social status. Will someone find us attractive or will they shun us? We worry about what the guy or girl on the other side of the classroom is thinking about us. We worry about school work—are we smart enough to handle it or will we come out failing? We worry about projects and papers and quizzes and tests. We worry about whether we can stay in school and pay the bill. We worry about our jobs—at least some of us do. Others haven’t gotten there yet as they joy ride around on the golf cart of life.

As we get older, we worry about our careers, and our income—will we make enough to pay the bills and survive in the lifestyle we’ve grown accustomed to? We worry about who we will marry, or if we will marry. We worry about whether we will be able to have kids, and once we have them, that gives us something totally new to worry about. How will we feed them and clothe them? How will we educate them? How can we get them through childhood in one piece when they continue to fall down and break bones or stick screwdrivers into electrical outlets, or jump off of swings when they are at their highest point? And how can we pay for the rising cost of Dr. bills when they do those things?

We worry that they won’t do good enough in school or that they get into too many fights or that they won’t be accepted or that they might fail and not only make themselves look bad, but make us as parents look bad too.

We worry about the perpetual cough that we can’t seem to stop or the fever of one of the kids or about our aging parents. We worry about the doctor’s report that says we have a tumor and we worry about cancer or strokes or high cholesterol and heart attacks. We worry about tornadoes and earthquakes and hurricanes and fires. We worry about our kids driving the highways at much too high a speed. We worry about the other people on the roads with our kids. Some of them we worry about because they might be drunk and could possibly hit one of our loved ones…and some we worry about because they happen to be on the road at the same time as our kid who just learned to drive—and they don’t yet know the lack of experience that our kid has. And so we worry, not only for our kid, but for the people our kid might hit.

We worry about divorce and our future. We worry about death and how to face it. We worry about hell and heaven. We worry about our family members that don’t know Jesus. We worry that we don’t know Jesus well enough. And we hate the question put to us—If you were to die right now, do you know where you would spend eternity? That worries us. We even worry when we find ourself NOT worrying, thinking that we must have forgotten something! In fact, have you noticed? We worry about just about everything.

And right in the middle of all of our worry, Jesus speaks. 

Matt. 6:25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 

Matt. 6:28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 

Stop worrying! Take those things to Jesus...and rest...in Him.

Worry? Who Me?

Most of us spend our lives worrying, don’t we?  We worry about how people will accept us.  We worry about our clothes—are they nice enough or with it enough?. We worry about acne.  We worry about our bodies—are we too fat or too skinny or too tall or too short or too ugly or somehow not acceptable.  We worry about our social status.  Will someone find us attractive or will they shun us? We worry about what the guy or girl on the other side of the classroom is thinking about us. We worry about school work—are we smart enough to handle it or will we come out failing?  We worry about projects and papers and quizzes and tests.  We worry about whether we can stay in school and pay the bill.  We worry about our jobs—at least some of us do.  Others haven’t gotten there yet as they joy ride around on the golf cart of life.

As we get older, we worry about our careers, and our income—will we make enough to pay the bills and survive in the lifestyle we’ve grown accustomed to?  We worry about who we will marry, or if we will marry.  We worry about whether we will be able to have kids, and once we have them, that gives us something totally new to worry about.  How will we feed them and clothe them?  How will we educate them?  How can we get them through childhood in one piece when they continue to fall down and break bones or stick screwdrivers into electrical outlets, or jump off of swings when they are at their highest point?  And how can we pay for the rising cost of Dr. bills when they do those things?

We worry that they won’t do good enough in school or that they get into too many fights or that they won’t be accepted or that they might fail and not only make themselves look bad, but make us as parents look bad too.

We worry about the perpetual cough that we can’t seem to stop or the fever of one of the kids or about our aging parents.  We worry about the doctor’s report that says we have a tumor and we worry about cancer or strokes or high cholesterol and heart attacks.    We worry about tornadoes and earthquakes and hurricanes and fires.  We worry about our kids driving the highways at much too high a speed.  We worry about the other people on the roads with our kids.  Some of them we worry about because they might be drunk and could possibly hit one of our loved ones…and some we worry about because they happen to be on the road at the same time as our kid who just learned to drive—and they don’t yet know the lack of experience that our kid has.  And so we worry, not only for our kid, but for the people our kid might hit.

We worry about divorce and our future.  We worry about death and how to face it.  We worry about hell and heaven.  We worry about our family members that don’t know Jesus.  We worry that we don’t know Jesus well enough.  And we hate the question put to  us—If you were to die right now, do you know where you would spend eternity?  That worries us.  In fact, have you noticed?  We worry about just about everything.

And right in the middle of all of our worry, Jesus speaks.

Matt. 6:25 ¶  “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

Matt. 6:28 ¶  “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying,  ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.

That’s all well and good Jesus, but what do I do instead of worrying?  I mean, my life is eaten up with it.

And Jesus says, “I’m glad you asked!” Look at verse 33.

33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its’ own.

Do you hear God speaking to you this morning?  Don’t worry.  But Lord, I’m afraid that…and we continue our litany of worry.  And yet, over 200 times in the Scriptures, Jesus admonishes us to not be afraid.  And He adds His promises to help us realize why we don’t need to be afraid.  Ponder this.

John 14:1 ¶  “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. 2 In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.

John 14:25 ¶  “All this I have spoken while still with you. 26 But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

Over and over God seeks to calm our fears.  Over and over He wants us to learn to rest our worries in the strength of His love for us.  Time and again, God calls us to stop worrying, start trusting and enjoy life.