Never Enough!

One of the most common things I hear as an opening line whenever kids come into to talk to me is, “Pastor Don, I’m so stressed I don’t know what to do.”

In our current society, we push kids, we hurry kids, we sign them up for all sorts of things…and think that it is never enough.  We expect them to be good at EVERYTHING…instead of taking their natural abilities into account.  We push and push for grades.  We enroll them in soccer and t-ball and gymnastics and dance and football and martial arts and we expect them to get all A’s in all subjects.  But what we are really doing is saying, in essence, “you will never be good enough unless you can produce the results.”  Or as one parent put it: “I’m paying the money so you better show me that I’m not wasting it.”  What’s the message there?  My money is very important to me.  I’m going to use some of it to help you develop…but don’t waste my money.  And the implied message is…if you don’t become good at it, you have failed me, and my money, and that is totally unacceptable.

Who says that everyone has to be good at everything?  What if, when they make a C in a class, you ask them what they are really good at and encourage them to pursue that?  What if you told them a C was good enough for an area they were not gifted in, while you encouraged them to pursue what they were gifted in?

What ever happened to individuality?  Instead, we want them to be good at everything…even when we are not!  We want them to make all A’s!  And we’ve gotten them to buy into the notion that unless they do, they will be a failure.

Help me finish these statements: You have to get good grades so that… (you can get into a good college)  You have to get into a good college so that…(you can get a good job)  You have to get a good job so that…(you can make lots of money)  You have to make lots of money so that…(you can be successful and happy).  Where did we get that?

From the world’s system of doing things.   So we put pressure on them to get good grades so ultimately they can be happy.  And what we really are doing is telling them that happiness is a station they can one day arrive at instead of a manner of traveling.  Which flies directly in the face of what God wants to develop in them.  God is more interested in their holiness than He is their happiness.  He wants to develop their character more than He does their bank accounts.  He wants them to find true joy in serving others.  But we short-circuit that in the lives of teens by elevating education and advanced degrees and people with money over serving God with passion.

Don’t misunderstand me.  There is nothing wrong with having an education and advanced degrees.  There is nothing wrong with being wealthy.  But if that is what we are telling kids will bring them happiness, then we have flat out sold them a lie.  And at what cost?  They have more stress in their lives than they can handle and we heap more and more on them telling them they have to do these things to what?  Climb the world’s social and economic ladders.  We tell them that what they are doing is never enough.

God designed that education and advanced degrees and even our wordly wealth all be used to honor Him.  Not some artificial socio-economic structure that we’ve bought into.  But there is something more inherently dangerous in this “never enough” message. 

This attitude carries over into their spiritual life as well.  We portray God as saying…you will never be good enough…but you better produce anyway.  Read your Bible.  Pray.  Witness.  Become a vegan.  Learn to preach.  Do good deeds for others.  Give Bible Studies.  Serve at the church. Get up at 4:30 every morning, exercise, never eat Twinkies (but Little Debbie’s are ok) and if you’re diligent, you just might make it.  But please understand…no matter what you do, it won’t be good enough.

And most will look at us and say, “Then why should I try?”  And we basically say, “Because that’s what God has called good little Christian boys and girls to do!  So do it!”

And we often make it harder than it should be.  

Why do we do that?   It’s perhaps because sometimes we get confused ourselves.  We sometimes don’t feel like we are good enough or are doing enough to make it into the kingdom. Let’s examine that for a few moments.

There used to be taught a theology, that unfortunately still lingers, that went something like this.  First of all, when you accept Christ, he forgives and cleanses you and imputes His righteousness to you.  That’s called Justification.  So far, they are on track.  No problem until we start looking at the “now what?” question.  After I accept Christ, now what?  

This line of theology goes that what happens next is that each day, Christ righteousness will come all the way down and meet you where you are and cover your inadequacies, but that He expects you to grow, so that each day, as you grow, Christ will need to cover less and less, until you have actually grown up to meet Him and you have perfectly reproduced the character of Christ.  This line of thought continues that at the end of time, when Christ stands up and makes His pronouncement about being holy, etc., you will need to stand without a mediator for a time, so you will need to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect, in order to make it to heaven.  If not, you are out of the pool and under the curse.

Sounds a little scary, but it also sounds plausible, so let’s examine it a little more closely.  If I tried to live a Christian life under that system, I would soon become very frustrated.  The frustration would come because I still come up against my sins and my sinful nature again and again, and it would seem that I may never reach the goal, no matter how hard I try.  As a matter of fact, when I really get honest, I realize that I will never  reach the goal!  No matter what I do, it will never be enough.  And the natural reaction would be to give up in defeat before I ever got started good.

But what does this theology do with Christ’s words in Matthew 11: 28?  "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.   29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.   30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Where is the easy yoke and the light burden?  Living under this theology is heavy and defeating.  As a matter of fact, it’s a lie because it puts the emphasis on what I have to do instead of on Christ.  It actually puts me and my works in competition with Christ and His sacrifice for me. The fact is, I will always be in need of Christ and His grace.  Always! Anytime a theology becomes more dependent on me, instead of Jesus, I need to put it aside.

John 14:6   Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

John 6:37 All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away.

See, I may never have enough, do enough, or be enough to make it on my own, but it’s not about me. It’s about Jesus.  Now THAT is Good News!!!

A Reason to Live

Man, ever since the fall, has been on quest for meaning and purpose in life.  And their search has pretty much yielded about as many different ideas as there are people.  We find tons of things to occupy our time, lots of work and free time activities, which we misconstrue to believe are the purpose of our lives.  But what we fail to realize is there is a relationship which makes life complete. Without that relationship, there is a void, a vacuum in life. Many people, even those who are well-known, can attest to that void.

For example, H.G. Wells, famous historian and philosopher, said at age 61: "I have no peace. All life is at the end of the tether." The poet Byron said, "My days are in yellow leaf, the flowers and fruits of life are gone, the worm and the canker, and the grief are mine alone." The literary genius Thoreau said, "Most men live lives of quiet desperation."

Ralph Barton, one of the top cartoonists of the nations, left this note pinned to his pillow before taking his own life: "I have had few difficulties, many friends, great successes; I have gone from wife to wife, from house to house, visited great countries of the world, but I am fed up with inventing devices to fill up twenty-four hours of the day."

Even the heady philosophers, after pondering where meaning is found, admit that it all seems meaningless.  That there is no stopping the hands of time, and that in the whole scheme of things man is pretty gutsy to stand up to the inevitable, today destined to lose his dearest loved one, tomorrow he himself will be rolled over.  Or as the book written in 1929 entitled Mysticism and Logic concludes:  “Man is proudly defiant of the irresistible forces that tolerate, for a moment, his knowledge . . . and his condemnation, to sustain alone, a weary but unyielding Atlas, the world that his own ideals have fashioned despite the trampling march of unconscious power.”

American humorist and author, Mark Twain, shortly before his death wrote, "A myriad of men are born; they labor and sweat and struggle;...they squabble and scold and fight; they scramble for little mean advantages over each other; age creeps upon them; infirmities follow; ...those they love are taken from them, and the joy of life is turned to aching grief. It (the release) comes at last--the only un-poisoned gift earth ever had for them--and they vanish from a world where they were of no consequence,...a world which will lament them a day and forget them forever."

King Solomon, the wisest man that ever lived tended to agree.  Look at Ecclesiastes chapter 1. 12 ¶ I, the Teacher, was king over Israel in Jerusalem. 13 I devoted myself to study and to explore by wisdom all that is done under heaven. What a heavy burden God has laid on men! 14 I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

When you look at all of life in a true perspective, it indeed does look meaningless.  Chasing after the wind, Solomon says.  That’s productive.  So what are we supposed to do with this life?

In Chapter 2, Solomon comes to his first conclusion: Eccl. 2:24 ¶ A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, 25 for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?

God designed us to live life with a purpose.  He wants us to find satisfaction in whatever it is we choose to do.  But He also wants us to know that in whatever it is we find to do, there is still an overarching purpose that transcends all of our activity.  And a person who lives life without realizing what that purpose is, is like …well, let me illustrate it.

 A rich man was determined to give his mother a birthday present that would outshine all others. He read of a bird that had a vocabulary of 4000 words, could speak in numerous languages and sing 3 operatic arias. He immediately bought the bird for $50,000 and had it delivered to his mother. The next day he phoned to see if she had received the bird. "What did you think of the bird?" he asked.

She replied, "It was delicious!"

A person who lives life without understanding the purpose, doesn’t really understand the value of the gift.  They just eat the bird and go on their way.   And we see that person and we say, “What a waste! Don’t they understand the value of what they’ve been given?”

Naturalist Henry David Thoreau is often noted for his statement that most men "live lives of quiet desperation." In an attempt to avoid that kind of existence, he lived alone from 1845 to 1847 in the woods of Walden Pond, Massachusetts. In 1854, he published his experiences in the book Walden. He wrote, "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear..."

I love that line.  “I did not wish to live what was not live, living is so dear…”  If only more people would come to understand that.  If only more Christians would live that out for the world to see and take note of.  Don’t live what is not life…  don’t waste your time on things that won’t bring more meaning to your life.  Don’t fritter away the hours without meaning and purpose.  Life was meant to be lived with a purpose.  A meaning.

Thomas Carlyle once wrote: A man without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder--a waif, a nothing, a no man. Have a purpose in life, and, having it, throw such strength of mind and muscle into your work as God has given you.

“What’s your purpose?” we ask a student.  And the answer comes back, “to make good grades.”  Why?  To get into a good college.  Why?  To get a good job.  Why?   To support myself and my family?  And then what? Live a good life, travel, enjoy.”

“What’s your purpose?” we ask a housewife.  “To keep my house in running in good order…to raise my kids…to cook and clean and mend.”  And then what?  When the kids are gone…then what?

“What’s your purpose?” we ask a businessman.  To make the next deal…to get ahead…to grow my business larger…to make more money…to be a success.”

John W. Gardner, founding chairman of Common Cause, said it's a rare and high privilege to help people understand the difference they can make -- not only in their own lives, but also in the lives of others, simply by giving of themselves.

Gardner tells of a cheerful old man who asked the same question of just about every new acquaintance he fell into conversation with: "What have you done that you believe in and you are proud of?"

He never asked conventional questions such as "What do you do for a living?" It was always, "What have you done that you believe in and are proud of?"

It was an unsettling question for people who had built their self-esteem on their wealth or their family name or their exalted job title.

Not that the old man was a fierce interrogator. He was delighted by a woman who answered, "I'm doing a good job raising three children;" and by a cabinetmaker who said, "I believe in good workmanship and practice it;" and by a woman who said, "I started a bookstore and it's the best bookstore for miles around."

"I don't really care how they answer," said the old man. "I just want to put the thought into their minds.

"They should live their lives in such a way that they can have a good answer. Not a good answer for me, but for themselves. That's what' s important."  (Dr. Dale E. Turner, MSC Health Action News, July, 1993, p. 7.)

I like that question: "What have you done that you believe in and are proud of?"   I like it because it begins to refocus us away from our activity and onto who we are becoming as people.  It begins to help us see that we are more than the activities we involve ourselves in.  Too often we seek to find our identities in what we do, and not what we’ve become.  Too often, we lose ourselves in this false identity and never become who Jesus wants us to be.

Christian author CS Lewis once wrote: The glory of God, and, as our only means to glorifying Him, the salvation of human souls, is the real business of life.

That’s God’s purpose for you.  Inspired Christian author Ellen White, in her book, lThe Ministry of Healing, page 164, writes: Christian motives demand that we work with a steady purpose, an undying interest, an ever-increasing importunity, for the souls whom Satan is seeking to destroy. Nothing is to chill the earnest, yearning energy for the salvation of the lost.

George Bernard Shaw,  was quoted in the book Courage - You Can Stand Strong in the Face of Fear, (Jon Johnston, 1990 SP Publications, p. 171) as saying, “This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one: the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap, and being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.”

There are only two paths. One path brings satisfaction and contentment.  The other misery.  Why?  Because the first path is what you were created to do…regardless of the occupation you choose.  The second path is what happens when you don’t know and understand and embrace your purpose.  It is as Solomon said…a chasing after the wind.

Solomon, as he finished his book of wisdom, brought it to this conclusion.

Eccl. 12:13 Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole [duty] of man.

Nothing else brings purpose to life.  Nothing else gives a reason to live.  Nothing else brings meaning.  God created us and knows that meaning is found in a relationship with Him alone.  He knows that purpose is found when we live out that relationship and share with others that they too can have meaning a purpose in life through a relationship with Christ.

As CS Lewis said, “The glory of God, and, as our only means to glorifying Him, the salvation of human souls, is the real business of life.”  May you go out and live life with a purpose.